what to do next?

as i'm sitting here in the aftermath of the semester...

pondering several things...for one...that first line of this entry...

and where to go from here.

So, i've finished my first year of college, i survived my 18th year.

now what?

The close of this school year has left me thinking.

do I really want to spend my life as a graphic designer?

working for fickle clients and fickler art directors.

I imagine that someday i'd work my way to the top and become an Art Director myself,

but there is a vast chasm of years and experience standing between now and then.

I wonder if I'll have what it takes.

or rather, will I be able to learn what I need to, to survive in the business?

It's becoming more and more apparent that school is not going to prepare me for the "real world"

sure, I'll learn plenty of techniques and 'how-to'

but will I learn how to perform in the atmosphere of the 'real world'

i have no doubt that I will have a rough time as i take my first steps into the field.

the question then becomes...

can I handle it?

do I want to handle it?

will I have the talent and the drive and focus to get the jobs that I need and then perform well in them?

I have no desire to go out and do mediocre work. It's all or nothing.

I had a chat with my wonderful teacher and another fellow today, they've both been in the field for years and know their stuff.

I learned more practical knowledge in the hour that I sat and listened to them, then I have all year long in all my classes.

does anyone else see a problem with this?

I realize that I need an education because that is what the business world has deemed necessary.

but can't i expect more from it?

I aim to learn how to ask the right questions and to challenge the teachers so that I get everything I possibly can out of these few years I'll spend in school.

My teacher pointed out to me today that I am at a point in my life, design-wise that I can do whatever I want.

This is my one chance to do crazy things with zero restrictions. I'm going to do my darndest to take full advantage of it.

God has always been good to me, and I live an incredibly blessed life no matter where i go or what i do. i couldn't be more thankful for that.

So i guess it's just figuring out where to go from here.

I'll be in Mackinac this summer, i leave in exactly one month. It'll be good to get away, have a change of scenery, gather new inspiration and experience.